Well the week has come to an end and it wasn't that bad! Sister did meet with her surgeon on Wednesday and she sounded really optimistic. Her surgery is scheduled for August 21st at 7:30am mountain time, for those who would like to include her in your prayers. They are going to remove one lobe, the affected lobe of her thyroid, and go from there. If the lobe has full blown papillary cancer, then they will have to go back and remove the whole thyroid. If it is not full blown but instead just pre-cancer (praying for this!!!) then she will be done and need nothing further. If it is full blown papillary cancer, then they may have to inject radioactive iodine for treatment, but no chemo or anything like that.
She also explained to me about all the tendons, nerves, glands in the area that can make the surgery very complicated. All the nerves and muscles that control your swallowing and control the epiglottis need to be watched, and then she mentioned the gland that controls your calcium absorption is in there too. They will keep her overnight to make sure she is absorbing calcium properly. Sister asked the doctor if he's had any problems with this in his patients, and he never has. So she feels really optimistic about that.
I'm still have weird dreams at night, but sleeping deeper. Last night, or should I say this morning I had a very weird one that is kind of spooking me. Sister and I were going to Heaven together, and Gavan was with us. Should I be worried about that? It was a long, drawn out, detailed dream with lots of things to write about. I've had a dream before that Heather was dying. I've had a dream before that something bad happened to Gavan. In this dream, I had an angel or spirit guide named James or Shamus or however you spell that. I thought that was weird. And also an angel or spirit guide named Clarences, not Clarence but Clarences. Weird. He said if you run when you go into the light, you have more energy when you get there. Sister and I were in this room before this hallway, we had to pick a spot on the wall to make our own tunnel, and this screen popped up that was talking about all things spiritual - Mother God, Father God, Angels, and a bunch of other words were scrolling by. Sister was beside me with her screen and she said "I don't know what any of this means though!" I said it's okay, because you're a good person, you do good in life, and you've always done for others." She was standing beside me holding Gavan, and in this dream Gavan was the size he was at six months old. He's two now, so that's not accurate. I remember asking Clarences if we could hold hands and go together. I guess before we did that I woke up.
Oh and to describe Clarences, if you see an older black man who looks like someone from New Orleans with that accent, kind of similar in appearance to the actor Scatman Crothers, a bit of Robert Guillaume, and something else. And spirit guide James/Shamus was a white man with brown hair, light to medium brown hair.
Weeeeiiirrrdd stuff! I hope it was just a dream. Or I like to say my reality is that sister and I grow old together and cross over together as old biddies. Hee!
I'm just trying really hard not to be disturbed by my dream.
Earlier in the dream Jim was mad at me and being mean to me. I dream things like this all the time, and I blame it on my past bad relationships. The past men in my life were unkind to me often, treating me with disrespect daily. Of course Jim has never ever done anything of that type, but he does in my dreams. But this dream was different. He was being mean, but I laid my hand on his heart and said "I know you love me. I know you do, I feel it!" When I laid my hand on his heart, he leaned back and his face was towards the sky as if something came over him. Then he looked at me with love and embraced me. Almost as if he had something else overtaking him, causing his unkindness, but when I 'woke' him up to how he really felt, he was free from feeling negatively towards me.
The night before I had a dream about my Avon customer Pat's late husband Norris. She and I talk about it a lot, she's told me before she's felt him around her. I was at her house Wednesday and we joke that her dog Queenie is psychic, for Queenie always knows when I'm there. She's an old dog, deaf now, rarely leaves Pat's son Kevin's room. But I've gotten to where all I have to do is say in my mind "Queenie, I'm here!" And she'll come running into the room for some lap time. I've been selling to Pat for five years, and Queenie has always been my little friend. She doesn't like people, neither does the pomeranian Princess. But they love me.
Anyhow in my dream Norris said something to Pat, maybe it was a message like he was saying hi or how are you, but I don't remember what he said.
Another important dream I wanted to write down so I won't forget is the one I had last week after Heather told me her news. We were both worried about how Mom would take this news. So that night I had a dream it was Heather's birthday and we were all having a gathering, but this was also when Heather was going to tell Mom her news. More and more people kept showing up, and people kept turning the music up and it was too loud to tell Mom. I was crying, sister was crying, and Mom was crying because she knew something was going on and the news couldn't be good. The family was all sitting around a table, all of us including John and Stacey, Shirley, Jim, Heather, Me, not sure where Heather's family was. But Mom walked over to us and held out her hand, we all reached out and we were a circle touching hands the way you do before a sport. That was symbolic to me, kind of "we are family, we will get through this, we all have eachother and that will never change."
So my week has been a good one, I'm still in a lot of pain due to the tension over worrying about my sister. The weather is hot and supposed to be a hundred, no rain in over a week and no rain in sight. I did finish typing up Mom's story so I'll post that here in a bit. It's long, so I'll wait til this afternoon or evening.
That's about all I have for now, not much else to tell about this week besides Big Brother, lol! But those who watch know that it kind of speaks for itself. I'm rooting for Dick, Danielle, Zach and Jen. But I am sure one of these four will be going home this week. Sucks. LOL.